I litterally just shake my head sometimes. I don’t understand people at all. I stopped trying to figure people out, because it would just agravate me to no end and that’s stress, which I don’t need at all. People try to get me to be all upset and pissed, for no reason at all and that their just being an ass themselves. Whatever people try to do, my week has been going so good, ever since Sunday night and nothing’s going to piss me off. I’m just simply not going to allow it. People can do and say shit, but I just let it roll off my back, as if it was nothing to me. Their not worth my time. I’ve got better time and energy to use my time on.
I allowed “a friend” to borrow money and it was just $20, so that wasn’t a big deal at all. I knew him back in elementary school with his mother and we just recently connected on Facebook in January, because it was my birthday and he was saying happy birthday to me. I remembered him from elementary school, so we decided to hang out. We were cool with each other, so that wasn’t a problem at all. We hung out once, twice. After the second time, one night he called me and said that his rent was going up and that he was needing a little over $100 for his electric bills and if I had about $25 to loan him, until his money kicked in. I told him, all I had with me, was $20 and he said that it was fine. He was also borrowing from other people and he’ll just find other ways to get money. When he called, he even gave me a sob story, how his mother was crying and was so upset and that all she had, was $30. As a friend, I’m a very nice person and anyone can tell you that. I felt bad, so I agreed to loan him the money. Upon agreeing to lend him the money, he told me that he’s coming by with his friend, but didn’t know what time and for me to not go anywhere. He came so late, because I guess he was waiting for his friend to give him a ride. I also told him, that I had the phone that I told him about, because he needed a phone and he had the nerver to say, “Oh well, I’d rather have the touch one that you have”. I told him, that I’m not giving up my touh phone, because that’s my phone and I’m already giving him a free phone, but yet, he’s being so picky about it. He took the phone, since it was free, but the next time I saw him, he was still complaining and saying that he wanted the touch phone. I told him, there was no way he was getting that phone. One, I may need that phone, incase I switch back and all my contacts and information was still on it. The next day, we both left his house early, because he had to take care of a lot of business and he said he was getting his check from unemployment. During the day, I texted him on his phone and on Facebook. I didn’t get any resposes. Infact, I tried to contact him many times after that day, but nothing. I finally got a hold of him and he said he didn’t get his check from unemployment. I don’t know how unemployment works, so I believed him. What pissed me off, is when I was saw on his Facebook, that he was getting a haircut and that he bought a lot of alcohol. I was pissed on that fact, because he had the money to get a haircut and buy all those alcohol, but yet kept on telling me, that he didn’t get his money, so he could’t pay me back yet. I mad a joke and I said “You got a haircut, but yet you couldn’t pay me what you owe me. Lol”. I sid it like that, in a joking manner. He didn’t reply, as if he was ignoring the comment all togethet. I left another comment and I told him, that I know that he saw the comment, because he had been on several times after. He still didn’t respond. After all that, I saw a comment and he had pictures of all the alcohol he posted. At that point, I was just beyond pissed and I wrote a comment and I wasn’t being nice anymore. Then he wrote on his status, that he’s a pimp and he’s good at it. That shit just pissed me to no extent. I kept on leaving him messages on his Facebook, for other people to see and I knew he didn’t like that and he said that he’s mom is pissed, because of what I had wrote on his Facebook. I could care less, what his mom may feel. He’s a grown 25 year old and he can’t even handel his own fucking bussiness on his own. I told him, that I better get my money and my phone that I gave him. His mothe was like oh you’ll get your phone and money on Friday. That’s fine with me. I told him, that I better get it no latter then 6pm on Friday, or his ass is getting served. The cops and my lawyer will be at his house by 7pm. He even got his dumb ass sister on me. He’s already 25 years old and he can’t even handel his bussiness and his problems on his own, yet he had to get his mother and his sister, but he claims, that he’s a bad ass. That’s an example right there, of what ghetto people are. He knew I wasn’t playing around, so he brought back the phone and gave me my $20. I knew he had the money all along, because if he didn’t then he wouldn’t of been able to bring me the $20 within an hour. If a person didn’t have the money, they wouldn’t of been able to get the money that fast. That’s why I wasn’t gonna play that game with him, saying that he didn’t get his unemploymnt check and he didn’t have the money fot me yet. That’s just full of bull shit. His stories and lies, can go out the window.
I’m not trying to offend anyone, but this is just one of the reasons, why I’d rather stick to my own kind of people. Better off that way. I’ve had my share of friends, blacks, whites, Hispanics, and Asians. Infact, a few of my friends are blalck. I have like one or two Hispanics, a few whites, and a few Asians and I’d rather stick with my litte circle that I have. Not gonna add anymore. Those few colored people that I do have, their from college, so their educated. I’ve also dated all races and all ages, mostly older onces, but I’d rather stick to the older ones and the Asians. Even tought it didn’t work with the Asians that I dated, because I’m single now, I’ve never had any type of problems with either of them. The brake up were all mutual. With the others, it was so much drama at the end and you realize what they really are. I’m not dealing with that again. When I look for somoen to date, I mainly look for Asians. If someone comes to me and wants to date me and their attractive enough, but their not Asian, it’s more like a short term thing and the thought of marriage isn’t going to ever get there. If it’s with an Asian, it’s more of a long term thing and I can possibly see a marriage there. That’s just how it is. I already know, even though I’m single, that I’m gonna be marrying someone that’s Asian.
I just simply asked Vic, how to update a Blackberry and he gave me his BBM. He doesn’t use BBm much. I don’t really use BBM much either. I did use it at first, but I would get a lot of random people to request to add me and it’s annoying, because I have to constantly hit denie. Now, I’ll be using it, because I’ve got Vic’s BBM. Lol. Simple things makes me happy and he makes me happy. I mean, we dated and it didn’t work out, but no one hurt anyone and he’s in a serious relationship right now, but we’re just friends and we just talk about regular things. Someone thought he cheated and I told them, that he’s not a cheater. He thought he cheated, because he’s talking to other girls. Just because someone talks to other girls and their in a relationship, doesn’t mean their cheating. I told him straight up, that Vic is a special friend and I’m not down for someone talking shit, or assuming shit about him. I’d bugg out, if someone does. He’s a great guy and I’m not just saying that, because I care about him or that I dated him, but he’s honestly a great guy. That’s it for now.

I don’t really post often anymore, but this time, I do. I don’t even know where to all beging with all this shit and drama. First off, things have been real slow on Ebay, so that sucks. I haven’t been seeing anyone lately and I just try to mind my own business most of the time. Around here with my family, there’s so much drama and bull shit that you really can’t mind your own bussiness and people try to get into your business as well. One thing I’ve learned is to never again tell my business to anyone, especially my family. My brother and his girlfriend have been having problems and she tried to get me involved. She’d ask me where my brother is, when she’s not with him and I really don’t care where he’s at I don’t ask him where he goes and he doesn’t ask me either. We do our own thing. She kept on asking a lot of questions and she just didn’t like what she heard and that’s her problem for always asking so many questions. When I date someone, I don’t ask them about their past. I just care about the present and the future. In the past, I didn’t know them, so I don’t care about it. I’ve just been mostly chilling at home during the week, because I’m not doing Ebay anymore. The person I was doing Ebay for, they don’t want to do it anymore, because their not making any money out of it. I really don’t care, if they’re making money or not out of it, because it’s not my stuff and it’s not my money. If it was my money and my stuff, I would have done it myself. It’s not hard. He just doesn’t have the patients to do it. If he would have done it himself, he would of saved a lot of money doing it. I’m just trying to look for a regular job right now and I’ve applied to some positions at the hospital by my house, so hopefully, I get something there overnight. Overnights would be perfect for me. I’ve been chillin with one of my friends from grade school, that I recently reconnected with in facebook, but he wouldn’t be someone that I would ever date, not that he’s immature or anthing, but he just doesn’t have any of the same goal as I do. He doesn’t ever want to get married and I do. If I date him and there are no possibilities of marriage, then that’s just a waist of time on my end. He’s not ugly or anything either, but I’d rather ultimately marry someone who’s Asian, like Chinese, or Filipino. I’d also want to be able to get myself together first and he’s not ready for a child and I have a daughter already. Not only all that, but I’m just so use to being with someone a lot older then me. Most people, think I’m crazy for being with someone much older then me, but a lot of people actually date people a lot older then them and it was on True Life. My first real relationship, he was 20 years older then me. The one before that wasn’t a real relationship, but we were together and he was only two years older. The one after my first real relationship, I was 24 and he was 39. My last one, I was 25 and he was 37 and he already had three kids, so he knew how it is to be a parent. I’ve experinced being with somoene without kids and someone with kids. Most of the time, I’d rather be with someone with kids, because then they understand my situationa and how it is to be a parent. Me and my daghter’s father, we were together for two years and the first year, we were together almost everyday and the second year, it was long distance. It just did’t work, because he wasn’t taking responsibilities. About two years after my daughter’s father, I dated someone for a short period of time and he didn’t have any kids and he didn’t understand when I had to be with my daughter at times, instead of him. My daughter comes first, before anyone else. We stayed friendds for about a year and a half and when I started seeing someone else, he couldn’t handel that and made problems for us and made me choose. Even though me and the person that I was seeing, we just ended up being friends, because he was always busy with his job and kids, I still chose him, because if someone makes you chose over someone else, then that’s not a friend. He’s seeing someone else now and he’s moving in with her. It kinda bothers me a little, but I’m ok with it, because I just want him to be happy. I use to still talk to him, but I haven’t talked to him, since December. I never really had the chance to love him, but I did care about him. I’m not upset or hurt, because he never really hurt me. We just broke up mutually, unlike the person that I was seeing before him, he was a real jerk and that’s something that I’d never forget. I can forgive a person, but not forget what they did. He’s not only done these things to me, but he also did it to another girl, because that girl told me all the things he’s done. She also had kids and he was trying to tell her how to discipline her kids, just like he was with mine. He doesn’t have kids of his own, so he has no right to tell anyone else how to discipline their child. Now that I’ve gotten rid of him in my life and chose to be friends with someone else, he’s constantly harassing me. He goes to my house unanounced and he goes to my mom’s job too and he sends me all sorts of email and his uncle is doing it too. I’ve been ignoring them and I told them that the next time that they do that, I’m going to have to call the cops for harassment. That shit isn’t called for and he thinks I’d go back to him, because I did before. I gave him a second chance and this time, I’m not going to give him a third chance to do it to me again. He’s a user and that’s all he’ll ever be. He’s fourty years old and can’t maintain a relationship. My friend, that I’ve been hanging out with, he’s got a weird situation. He was dating this girl for about four years and they were about to get married, but she passed from cancer. He said, six months after she passed, weird things has been happening. He said, that when he still had her cell phone and it had no cervice, it rang and when it rang, it was unknown and when he picked it up, all he heard were static sounds and her voice say, I miss you. He also said, sometimes at night, he’d hear footsteps and scratching noises. He said that his friend has heard it before too. That night that I stayed over his house, I did hear scratching noises and I thought it was him, but he said it wasn’t. Then he said he heard footsteps too, but I didn’t hear that at all. He also said that the red light on his TV would blink at night. I did see that blinking, but only every time that we’d talk about her. That’s weird, but too weird. He claimed, that he thinks that she doesn’t know that she’s dead. I’m not buying all that shit. I believe, people die and their souls lives on, but the way he tells me about her not knowing that she’s dead, I just think that’s crazy. He said he doesn’t want marriage, because marriage just cases problems and I told him, that he’s thought about it before, because he almost got married to someone, but unfortunatly, they passed away. He doesn’t want marriage right now, because he’s still not over her ater all these years and he just doesn’t want to admit it to himself and to anyone else, so he’s just making any excuse. I’m not beat to waist my time with someone like that. I need someone, who’s got the same goals as me and who’ll eventually want to get married. If I’m going to be with someone like him, I’m just going to end up waisting my time. I wouldn’t mind dating someone like him, but ultimately, I’d rather date someone who’s Asian, preferably Chinese, or Filipino, but it wouldn’t matter, just not Japanese. Chinese would be my first choice though. The last one I dated, whom found me on a dating sight, he was Chinese. My daughter’s father, he’s Filipino, so that’d be my second choice. Look up Jason Chen, someone like that is somene who’d I’d love to date. Lol. I have this Filipino friend and he’s only 18 and he’s just way to immature for me. First of all, he’d always ask to hang out when he’s got nothing to do. Then when it’s time to hang out, he’d tell me last minute that he’s got work or something. Yesterday, he went with me to the post office and we walked there, even though it rained. When we got there and I was done, we decided to eat lunch and he didn’t want to eat close by, so we took the bus and were going to eat at Applebees. When we got there, they had another half an hour to open up. I told him to just go to the store next door and wait. He didn’t want to and he went all the way to the other store, which was on the other side. When it was time, I called him a bunch of times and he didn’t even pick up. He didn’t pick up, because he didn’t want to, or he lost battery, because he kept on playing music and video games on his phone, but I doubt he lost battery, because his phone was still ringing and he doesn’t have his voice mail set up, so I couldn’t leave a voice mail. I was kinda upset, but I got over it, because he’s only 18 and immaturity liket that, is expected in someone his age. That’s why I really don’t date anyone my age, or younger. I date older guys all the time. That’s it for now from me. I’m just listening to my fave Chinese singer Wang Lee Hom. I love him. I guess, the one reason why I love him, is because I love Chinese music and that he looks just like the first guy I dated. I actually didn’t get over him, until four years after we broke up. Lol. Long as time, but that’s what first love does to you. Would I ever get back with him now, maybe not. I have a child now and he’s not someone I’d want around her, but if I didn’t, I’d definatly get back with him. Well, until next time.

I can’t believe it’s the end of the year and Christmas is coming in a few days. The year just went by so fast. People say that 2012 is the end of everything. I don’t really believe that, because no one really knows, when the world would end. I don’t know what’s in stalled for the year 2012, but I know it’s not the end of the world. Lot of things happened this year and you realize who your real friends are and who’s just out there to use you. I’ve realized a lot of that this year. I have more of an acquaintances, then actual friends. People shouldn’t be so quick to call others their friends, because it takes a lot to be a friend to someone. I thought that Allen was a friend and that’s no friend. He and his friends aren’t friends to anyone. He’s a user, his other friend steels a lot from people and his mother, and the other one cheats on his wife and doesn’t have remorse about it. I don’t steel from my friends or family and when I’m with someone, I don’t hurt them, by cheating on them. I’m loyal to whoever I’m with. I know how it is to be hurt, so I will not hurt anyone else. These people wanna talk crap about real people, such as Victor, that he plays games and say that he’s no for real, but they need to look at themselves in the mirror, before they can talk about someone else. They wanna say that their mature and they have more experience, and then they better look again. If the experience that their talking about, is steeling, hurting people, cheating, and using people, then that’s all they know what to do. Victor is nothing like that. His ex-wife was the one that cheated on him and he never hurt me and he doesn’t steel from anyone, because he’s got his own job and it’s a great job and he can get whatever he wants, without steeling. Even though it didn’t work out with him, doesn’t mean that he hurt me, or that he’s a bad person. When it ended, we still stayed mutual friends and we didn’t have a problem. We would still talk on facebook when he had facebook, but now he doesn’t have facebook, so if I need him for anything, I can just always text him. Even when he changed his number, he still texted me Happy Turkey Day and he gave me his number. If he didn’t want me to have his number, then he wouldn’t of texted me. I don’t bother him and just text me for no reason. I only text him, if I need him for anything important, as a friend, or anything else. One thing I don’t understand, is when people get divorced and they get another boyfriend or girlfriend, I don’t understand how a parent will allow the other parent’s boyfriend or girlfriend, be around their child. Victor and my cousin’s ex-husband are doing it. My cousin is the mother of the two boys and she shouldn’t allow another woman be around her kids, as if she’s the mother of those kids. That lady isn’t married to the father yet and she’s acting like she’s the mother and her mother, as if she’s the grandmother. I can’t see myself allowing that to happen. If my child’s father has a girlfriend, that’s fine, because that’s his life, but that person better not act like she’s the mother to my child. My child has a mother and that mother is me and only me. Victor’s girlfriend is around his three kids all the time and yet he says that’s a stepmother’s roll. I totally understand that, but they’re not married yet. I don’t understand that, because I don’t do stuff like that. I mean, when I get with someone, yeah I would want that person to like my daughter and love her, but not until I know for a fact, that it’s going to be a long term thing and that it’s going to work out, because if it doesn’t work out, then the child’s already use to the person and they’re going to just get hurt by it, if things doesn’t work out. I’ve done it once and I’ve learned my mistake and I’m not doing it again. I mean, if I’m with someone and they have a child, I’ll care for that child, as if it was my own child, but not unless their father allows me. It only happens, because the parent allows it. It’s a hard situations and every situation is different. I’m glad, I don’t have that problem, because my daughter’s father doesn’t have a relationship with her and she doesn’t even really see her. I’m glad; I don’t have to go through that.

Let's start off with the whole Victor situation. I think it's confirmed, that he's bipolar. I don't understand what goes threw his head. A couple of weeks ago, I asked him if we were friends, or if we're just acquaintances. He didn't give me a direct answer and all he said, was that he doesn't have acquaintances. I didn't know how to take that, so I just left it alone. As long as we're talking, it was fine with me. Anyway, the other day, we got into a long conversation and long story short, we were talking about what substitute a friend and or acquaintances. I told him, that my definition of a friend, is someone that I talk to and hang out with and my definition of an acquaintances is someone that I only talk to once in a while and I told him, that since we don't hang out, then he's just an acquaintance. I told him, we don't hang out and he said he wouldn't hang out with me, so I told him then we're just acquaintances. Oh boy, did he take that to an offence. He said he didn't want to talk to me anymore, because I didn't see him as a friend. He said he considered me as a friend, well boy does he have a funny way of showing it. Guy are really hard to understand sometimes and you never know what goes threw their heads. One thing though, when he said that he considers me as a friend, that shows how mature he is unlike Allen, he can never be mature. He came out and said we're not friends. He can't handle the fact, that I'm seeing other people now. It's been so long, that he was the only one I liked and I didn't want to see anyone else and when I finally started seeing other people, he couldn't handle that. Too bad for him. When I chose Victor over his ass, he couldn't handle that and said that the only reason why I chose Victor, is because he's Asian. Being Asian had nothing to do with it at all. I chose Victor, because at that time, we were trying to make a relationship and Allen and I wasn't and he kept on looking for the wrong things from Victor, like he kept on telling me, that Asian girls usually don't cheat, so it was hard for him to believe that Victor's ex-wife really did cheat on him, or the fact that all Victor wanted was sex. Even if his ex did or didn't cheat, that wasn't my business at all and if sex was all Victor wanted, that was my choice, not his. Anyway, I think there's something with Victor, but I don't know what, because he made a comment, that he was like "I don't want to be forced to block you." If he really didn't care, then he wouldn't of cared if I was blocked or not. Then he said that it's creepy that I keep looking at his page and that to him, it's stalking. If he really believed that I was stalking him, then why in the world would he tell me that he was having dinner with a friend by my house? That made no sense at all, but it's cool, not like I didn't know before he told me. Lolz! I don't know, but I feel like there's something with Victor and I, but I think God is saying this isn't the time right now, because he's got things going on with himself and so do I. I knew when we tried dating, that he could be the one and I still think so a bit, but not as strong as before, because if there's no chance whatsoever, then we wouldn't be talking and he wouldn't of gotten offended about the fact that I said we were only acquaintances. He actually said, that he considers me as a friend. I spoke to Jay B the other day on the phone and he asked me if there was even a chance of me and Allen getting back together, even as friends and I told him hells no, there's no chance whatsoever. It came out of his mouth, that we're not friends. Victor never said anything hurtful intentionally to me and if he did, he was just trying to be a friend. Allen's said so much hurtful things to me, that I'm not going to subject myself to that situation anymore. I'm not going to cry because it's over, but be happy that it happened. Jay B is cool, but I just don't want to be in that mess. There's too much going on with that and I don't need to add more drama and besides, I really don't want to be involved anymore with anyone that is friends, or knows Allen, because when things get back to him, it's like things get turned around, like it's my fault. The whole thing with Karin, I'm going to drop that crap. I'm not even going to care anymore about what she said, because at this point, she's really no one to judge me. She did way worst then me and yet she has something to say about what I did in the past, whether it's with Allen or Victor and she wanna claim that Victor and Allen were jerks. I mean yeah Allen turned out being bad, but he was nothing compared to the dude that she was with. He slept with her and then after he slept with her, told her that he has a girlfriend, but their just not working out anymore. Allen ended up being a jerk, but at least when we were together, he didn't just sleep with me. We actually had a real relationship. We went out to dinner, fishing, hang out, went places, and I knew his whole family. He's a jerk for real, but he wasn't a total jerk. With Victor, it just didn't work out and he's been mature about it, but unfortunately, Allen can't be that mature and he's sad, because he claims to have a lot of experience in in his belt, but yet he's really immature. I did care for him at one point in my life, but at this point, it's like I could care less. Victor, I don't know. I still care, but not as much as if we were together. Anyway, I finally met Shawn. OMG! He's cuter then he is in his pictures. He's actually very sweet and he seems like he's also sensitive. He had to go to work after, so we just hung out for a little bit, but it was fine. He said he's going to meet someone else on Friday and he'll let me know who he decides on, which is cool too. It's no pressure, because it's not like how it was with me and Victor. We didn't kiss, or nothing happened. We just met, talked, and got something to eat. That's it. Everyone that I met on OKCupid, wasn't bad at all, except for two, who were really weird. After Shawn had to leave, which was understandable, because it was for work, I went to Union Square. It was a nice day, so I thought I'd walk around a bit. There was this weird as dude, who just came up to me out of nowhere, when I was sitting down and he started to put his arms around me and then he actually took my foot and put it on his lap. Eyew! This world has a lot of crazy ass nuts out here. Now, on the other hand, if he was so hot ass Asian dude like Victor, Jason Chen, Tae Yang, or Joseph Vincent, then that'll be a different story, but he's some nasty, ugly ass dude, who I would of thrown up on. Tae Yang by the way, is some hot ass Korean singer and might I say again, hot as hell. Jason Chen is cute as hell too, but Tae Yang is cuter and I melt every time I see him. OMG! He's not even Chinese or Pinoy, but he's Korean. I have no idea what the hell he's saying in his songs, but who the hell cares, half the time I'm not even paying attention to his songs, or what he's saying. I would love to learn how to speak Korean right about now. Tae Yang knows how to speak English, so that's fine with me. He can still speak to me in Korean, that's fine with me too. Lolz! I got so many bug bites from this afternoon, but it was all worth it. I got to talk and get to know Shawn a bit more. I don't know what's going to happen, but he said he'd let me know either way what he decides. It's cool. Like I said, I don't go for the ugly guys. Every guy that I dated was cute and knew their stuff. Only one person I wasn't attracted to at first, because I wanted something else, but after a while I ended up liking him, for reasons that are unmentionable. His name shall be unmentionable too. Lolz!

Are you serious! Where should I start? First off, I'm not trying to be funny, but I think Victor is bipolar. One minute, he'll act like he's a friend, who's totally willing to listen to me and give me good advice. I directly asked him, if he was just an acquaintance or a friend and he never really directly answered my question, all he said is that he doesn't have acquaintances, so right there a person would assume, that we're friends, because friends do talk and if you're not someone's friend, then why would you talk to them. Everything seemed to be cool, when that conversation ended. The very next day, I texted him about me being robbed at the post office in Nutley and he acted like he could care less. He's like why are you telling me this? I you have no point. That made me feel like shit and yet when I told him that he's the reason why I go for counselling, he acts as if he doesn't understand why. To me, being nice to someone one day, then being mean to that person the very next day out of no reason, seems like they have multiple personality, hence bipolar. I don't know for a fact if he is one, but he sure seems like it. He'll always remember that I've hurt him, even though he knows that I didn't have ill intent, but he'll never remember any of the times, when he's hurt me. He'll say that he never recalled those things. I've been with Allen for a year and a half and Victor for only a month and a half, but not being with Victor hurts me more and my therapist said it's because Victor was more of my preference, to as whom I would date and it's because if I dated Victor, then I wouldn't have any problems with my family, since he's Chinese as well. I had so much problems with my family about Allen, since he's not like us and that ended the relationship and we couldn't get along after a while, since we just had totally different cultures. I was raised the Asian old fashioned way, and he was raised the ghetto way, that's why he doesn't work and just gets money from the government. I told Jeremy about the being robbed thing and as a friend he responded and said what he thought, just like my friend Will did. They were like, hope you didn't get hurt and such. That's what a friend is. Sometime I just want to tell you something as a friend and do I really need to have a point to say something? Really! Even though Jeremy said something that kinda got to me at one point, over all, he's still a sweet friend. He's always been there to hear me out, even if it's just threw text. We don't hang out, because he's busy with school and work and I've got my child. No matter what, when I text him, he doesn't say crap like, oh why are you telling me, or do you have a point? I feel lucky that Jeremy is cool like that, even though he doesn't see me as anymore then a friend. I did tell him, that I had a crush on him at one point, but it didn't bother me that he didn't feel the same way, because no everyone feels the same about everyone. I'm not even hurt about the situation, because he's being a good friend about it and he doesn't say crap like, I don't want to hear you talk about me the way you are, blah blah blah, like Victor does and the fact that me and Jeremy are just friends and never had an intimate relationship for one, is why I'm not bothered by the fact that we're just friends. I don't understand Victor and I know he's hurt before from what his ex did, but that's no reason to hurt someone back. Allen, there's no hope for him at this point. He's hopeless. I was around his area today, because I had to take the train there and the security guard from his building saw me and told me that his sister Paulet came to the building and was talking about me for half an hour, saying that she wanted to beat me up and crap. I told the security guard, that the family has issues and I don't want to be bothered by that family anymore and that's why I don't come around anymore. He thinks that Allen is a nice guy. I said that it's just a front. I did call Allen about what the security guard had said and Allen swore that Paulet doesn't come over there. Okay, so what reason would the guard be saying all this and lie about it? I don't go over that area to make trouble or anything. I go there, because the train is right across the street. I have no need to want to go over there. My life is as good as it gets right now and I don't need trouble and drama from those ghetto people. When I told Allen and his mother about it, they said their not going to say anything to her about it. Not going to say anything? That's your sister and daughter and you should at least ask if she is doing these things and if so to stop. If someone was to tell me that my brother is saying some stupid stuff about one of my friends and my friends told me, yeah I can't tell him what to do, but I would just ask why or if he is doing these things. I sware on my life, if she does something to me or my child, because she did steel all of my daughter's pictures, either she'll be eating cement and I'll be in jail, because she's not going to get away with anything. My daughter my get on my last nerves sometimes, but that's my daughter and no one will touch her. Victor and I didn't work out, but Victor doesn't make trouble, unlike Allen's ghetto family. They don't want to prevent trouble, by just at least asking their daughter and brother what happened, then if I call the cops or something, then they can't say I just went ahead and called the cops. I swear, people have nothing else better to do, but talk about others. Shaking my head!